How To Be A Gentleman

How To Be A Gentleman

How To Be A Gentleman: A Timely Guide to Timeless Manners



Print Length: 240 pages
Publisher: Thomas Melson; Rev Exp edition (April 8,2008)
Language: English

          Formats: Hard copy E-book              

           ISBN-10: 1401604730

           ISBN-13: 978-1401604738

             How does one become not just a man, but also a gentleman? Most men, myself included, generally fall into three classes; those who are gentlemen, those who think being a gentleman is a good thing, and those who regard gentlemen as relics from an antique age, like the ones portrayed on Masterpiece Theater. We live in an age where a house is not a home unless it has what is often referred to as, a ‘man cave’. The word cave says it all. Men, it’s time to send that leopard skin loincloth to the Goodwill. Put the baseball cap that hides your bald spot on the peg behind the bedroom door. Buy sandals, if you must go sockless, and leave the flip-flops in the shower stall where they belong. In short, step away from the tree and become a gentleman. But wearing pants that fit, or shoes that don’t make slapping noises when you walk down the street doesn’t make a gentleman—these make a neater, sexier looking guy. Gentlemen are very sexy, not only because they know what to wear, and wear it well, but also because they behave like guys who genuinely care about the other people around them. Someone once described a gentleman as one who is kind to others, even if they can be of no use to him. It may be true that all relationships are symbiotic, but a lack of symbiosis is never a reason to ignore the feelings of others.

And so now I come to this little book. How To Be A Gentleman: A Contemporary Guide to Common Courtesy by John Bridges, is a must read for any man, and the women and men who love him.  I recommend this guide be kept at hand at all times. Read it often. There are ten short chapters in this book. They deal with everything from checkout counter courtesy at the super market, to how to eat caviar when dining at the White House. My partner Peter, knowing how much I love caviar and how often I dine at the White House, gave me How To Be A Gentleman: A Contemporary Guide to Common Courtesy as a gift. The inscription dedicated to me on the flyleaf read, ‘Not because you need it, but because you can appreciate it (and it’s funny)’. Relieved, I scanned the book’s contents page. The first chapter immediately caught my eye because it deals with real life. Eagerly, I read its advice. ‘A gentleman never eats his lunch while he is behind the wheel of a vehicle.’ One would assume this is obvious, but apparently not.

This one is especially timely. ‘A gentleman does not assume it is the other person’s responsibility to provide the condoms.’ Bridges also says, ‘If a gentleman eats in bed, he always changes the sheets.’ Don’t even go there! J

How about, ‘A gentleman never adjusts his crotch in public.’ It’s true. One should never draw attention to one’s own shortcomings.

A gentleman never wears a hat, or cap while dining indoors.

A gentleman always waits for a woman to offer her hand before shaking hands. If she doesn’t offer, he doesn’t shake.

I’ll leave off here with a few more thoughts from John Bridges. ‘A gentleman never drinks a cocktail through a straw.

—A Gentleman does not turn down invitations. He never waits for something better to turn up.

—When a gentleman feels the urge to color his mustache, he shaves it off.

—A gentleman does not brag.’

And lastly, ‘In the morning a gentleman always offers to get up and make the coffee.’

For me, the take away is this word in the title—Courtesy, which is the ritual where a gentleman avoids making himself the center of attention at the expense of others.

So my dears, buy this book, read it, and most importantly, employ its advice. It couldn’t hurt.